email to mum

this is an email i sent to my mum. it is the symbol of something rotten finally ending.

do you feel this need to drive people away?
do you really think you and steve are going to be together forever?
your already half the person you used to be, you are overweight and the rosy in your cheeks had gone. you have given up life for starch.
are you actually happy?
or is it just that if you face the truth you won't be able to handle it?
i might not be happiest at the moment but i have a whole life ahead of me. what do you have? truly?
you say we left you, but you left us.
so when you are all alone and can't even bear to look in the mirror remember that you lost out. you ran when everyone else stayed.
remember what you gave up.
but don't bother to try to get anywhere near me or hannah again because you aren't anything to us anymore except a bad memory that in time will fade.
you will probably delete this and never even read it but i don't care.
i used to care what you thought, but you can't reach me anymore, you can't feed off the misery of others.
i didn't leave, i don't need to feel guilty. it's you that left, you that has nothing.
from this point on i have no mother, and i am glad. because the thing i was most terrfied about was ending up like you.