love, life, leave me alone.

having a bad day. it was alright most of the day until i got a belly ache and it was still 1 1/2 hours to go home.
i will tell you the back ground, jack is my mate som's cousin, he starting speaking to me a while ago. he live in london. the first time he saw me was when ben had turned webcam on and i didn't realise and was dancing in my room, not bad dancing or woteva, just body ripples and that. well, jack was round som's so saw me.
he said he liked me and som kept teasing me. i din't think much of it. i talked to jack loads, he said he fancied me but i thought he was joking. but som kept saying he wasn't. i convinced myself i didn't fancy him even though all my friends said it was obvious i did. so eventually i let myself like him.
he was going to move to norwich in august but his mum has decided to send him to boarding school, who actually goes there these days. so we won't ever be able to go out because i won't ever see him. or speak that much because he can't go on msn all the time anymore.
it completely sucks. am i not worth it? thats it isn't it! i don't deserve being liked. i don't deserve it, do i? this is why i don't let myself love easily in the first place, it just hurts.